I’m not sure when I’ll be ready to write up the last of the adventures that Rich and I got to have together, but I promise that I will as they mean so much, to both of us. At the moment however, going through the details of our last year’s worth of trips is just too painful. This site will stay open though, and I will eventually tell you all about what we did, as we lived to love, walk and swim together all over the world, and we (Rich and I – yep, we’ll alway come as a pair) want everyone to know that disability does not have to be an obstacle to following your dreams. Don’t get me wrong, it’s definitely harder for those living with disability and chronic health conditions, and there will always be people who don’t want to help, or who try to discourage you, but equally so there are others who will go out of their way to help lift you up, and it’s those people that we have to focus on finding, and cherishing.
So much more than a husband, Rich is my soulmate, and having that connection adds a whole different dimension to grief. If any of you have read Philip Pullman’s books about Lyra, if I talk about the spirit daemon connection, that might give you an insight into how it feels to physically lose the special person that had become part of you. Rich and I merged from day one, and whilst I still have many connections with him, that physical loss has broken me. I am not the person I was, and nor will I ever be. How could I be? My world imploded a few months ago, when my special person was torn away. If you’d like to read more about grief following out of order bereavement, I’ve started writing about it here. Rich loved my openess and honesty, regularly pleading with me to never change, and was always suggesting that I should write more, so here I’m writing about love, mourning and all the things than happen when you have to live everyone’s worse nightmare, half a lifetime too soon.
In the meantime, I wanted to thank you all for following our story, and for taking an interest in the way in which we lived and loved, when faced with adversity. Rich is the best human being I’ve ever encountered, and he changed my world. He touched the hearts and minds of everyone he met, so the least I can do (when I’m ready) is to ensure that our plans to help others happen. And they will, because I love him so very much.
Lots of love, Hayley x